Good evening. Sorry I don't have anything to share with you today. I figured I should at least post something so everyone knows I'm alive.
I could definitely be better, but I am alive. I just haven't quite been myself for a while, don't really care at this point about finding my way back because the person I was failed miserably at so many things, parenting being the most important.
There are just about as many dust bunnies and cob webs in my craft area as there are on my website. lol. I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life. Where I was at, where I am, where I was going. Evaluating the importance of everything that was important to me, have come to determine that those things were only important to me and hold no significance to those who are / were close to me.
On the good side of things, books have been filling most of my time. I have spent no time on the computer (800 email messages have piled up so far), no crafting, no entertaining company, no nothing other than reading. I've found that the more I read and get into books the less I think or dwell on my own lame existence. It has been a nice interruption.
I'm sure as soon as things blow over with Lauren and I'm able to see Dylan again, my disability comes through, and we get the house finished, things won't feel or look so bleak. It's just too many things at once and dealing with unbearable physical pain as well, its messing with my noggin.
I assure you, in time I will be back up & fighting in my familiar form. Until then, please be patient with me and understand if I avoid communication with any of you via phone or in person, please don't internalize and think that you've done something to upset me. I also know that the negativity of this post will upset some of you because it's not positive and uplifting. I'm not going to lie and say that things are just great and I'll be pissy if I want to! :)
Fore those who have stuck it out through this entire post: X's & O's and thank you's for being there for me.
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Shawnie, Everyone has those days, weeks or months! I am in a slump right now too, but remember the lord is there always and knows your pain, and you will see your family in heaven, this life is not the end! The Lord knows the situation and its part of his plan tho may not know WHY! All you can do is let it go to him and pray for her! Its o.k that you posted a negative post, but in reality it is not negative it is just venting and that's o.k, you will reflect back on this and see how you were, what made you stronger and use it as a stepping stone in your life.! Things will look up. Read some up lifting books too it will help you!! You are a nice person even tho I don't know you that much, I feel like I kinda do. Thanks for updating lol. And you have admitted that crafting helps you feel better and also helps you to take you mind of of things, so get up, dust your self off and get back on the horse and get to work. ( just kidding by the way). I wish you only happy joy's in your life!!! Best of luck to you look forward to seeing new posts!!!
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